the heart behind the ministry at home

editor's note: Once again, it's catch-up day for me in cyberspace, so don't be surprised if I have a couple of posts up today. =) 



photo credit



Proverbs 31 and Titus 2:4-7 are two portions of Scripture that are quoted to and by women when it comes to the ministry at home.  I have found that it causes one of two responses; either a woman embraces it full force and makes it her life goal to embody these Spirit-filled descriptions, or a woman disdains it and passes it off to other women stating that Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 is simply "not her ministry."

I can't tell you how many women have spoken to me and have mentioned that Titus 2 is "my ministry" and "my calling."  They go on and on encouraging my heart (and I am so very grateful for that) yet neglect their own in the role and calling of Proverbs 31 and Titus 2.  Beloved wives, mommies and homemakers, Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 aren't just a specific ministry some of us are called to, it is a guide to how He will establish holiness and love in our hearts as women in these roles.  If we've said "I do" to that man we've loved, then we are called to be Proverbs 31 and Titus 2; if we have little ones or elder ones running around or running off to college, then we are called to be Proverbs 31 and Titus 2; if we stay at home, work in a secular place or serve the ministry outside the home, whether it's part-time or full-time then we are called to be Proverbs 31 and Titus 2.

These precious portions in Scriptures (along with many others including 1 Samuel 1-2, Ephesians 6, 1 Peter 3 and Malachi 4) are clearly written out for our benefit, it is an introduction to our identity.  Not because of the works we do, but the condition of our hearts.  It is possesing the heart of Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 that causes holiness to grow within us as wives, mothers and women.  It isn't the works and the acts of the Proverbs 31 woman, but rather that her actions demonstrate where her heart and her priorities are.

Matthew 6:21 teaches us that "where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."  The impossible-to-attain-personality of Proverbs 31 had her heart set on the very gifts and blessings Jesus Christ gave to her to steward, shephard and serve while on this earth.  So really, when we serve and prioritize our home with a Titus 2, Proverbs 31 heart we are setting our hearts on eternity, understanding that our home, our husbands and our beautiful children-filled hearths are really the way we establish treasures in heaven.

There is a unique grace for us wives and moms and it is a glorious thing to partake in it.  I am convinced that His grace will transform me into the Proverbs 31 woman with every Titus 2 quality.  It is a glorious ministry and if that is all I've achieved at the end of my life ministerally I will confidently meet the Father knowing I have been a good steward of the talent which He has entrusted to me.

* this post is linked up with Titus2esdays and Women Living Well Wednesdays

my fear and longing for beauty

Saturday Night was quite the night.  The Husband and I were invited to a ball.  The Agape Ball was held by Covenant House Orlando on behalf of some homeless young adults.  Covenant House wants to honor them and make them feel like they're worth it.  Because as you and I both know, (or should!) they are. It was such a sweet night.  Looking out into the sea of faces, these "kids" (and I call them so because I've permanently entered into the Mama Hen role and don't know how to get out!) came alive as the music played and they were given the opportunity to show off their dresses and suits (all donated by a loving community, btw) and all their dance moves.

It was an absolutely stunning picture of what the Hope of Christ can do to restore lives.  I was mesmerized.

But. Before this mesmorazation (is that even a word? Ehh, you get what I mean) came the break down.  See, this ball was an event that required dresses and make up and hair done and all that jazz.  In retrospect, I was pretty excited about the opportunity to dress up and feel feminine.  Having lived in sweat pants and t-shirts for the bulk of the last two years, (because let's face it, as a pregnant woman, I did not feel pretty nor like I was "glowing" and I did not enjoy showing off my anything!) the prospect of a dress, heels and a little makeup was kinda very nice.

So, my wonderful make-up artisty/personal designer of a wonderful sister rose up to the challenge and said she'd do my hair/makeup/style for this particular evening.  She.Is.Brave!

But as I sat in the chair for an eternity (or an hour and a half, you choose) and inhaled hairspray and was poked and prodded to death (ok, maybe it wasn't that bad, but still you get what I mean) all the excitement fell and suddenly panic took its place.

Panic by the way is no understatement. I suddenly felt very very afraid.

There's something about a pretty dress and heels and having been "done-up" so to speak that leaves a woman totally and completely vulnerable.  It is leaving it all on the line as we beg the question... "Do you think I'm beautiful?"  Sweat pants, t-shirts and baby vomit pretty much guarantee that we won't be consider the question, therefore the answer is allusive (though what a wonderful job our men do to remind us we're beautiful those times anyway).  But rock out the very best you got and suddenly insecurity is like a horrible, old companion you can't get rid of.

Okay, so maybe this isn't you.  But it's me.  And just a couple other women I know.

But seriously, how often do we hide behind the safety of our Mommy-attire and simply forget to leave it all on the line everyday and choose to be beautiful? In Staci Eldredge's Captivating her and John beautifully describe the desire of women to be beautiful...

"The essence of woman is beauty.  She is meant to be the incarnation-- our experience in human form-- of a Captivating God.  A God who invite us.  Beauty is what the world longs to experience from a woman.  So listen to this: beauty is an essence that dwells in every woman.  It was given to her by God.  It was given to you."  


God created me for the purpose of exhibiting beauty.

Umm, whoa.

Useful? Yes, I can see that. Practicality is now my middle name and I can totally see how He would create me for the purpose of usefulness and service to Him, but for the purpose of beauty? No.

Usefulness and practicality are safe; beauty demands that I take a risk.  But in a broken society that tells us that beauty is a 102lb, 5'7 supermodel who wears 13lbs of makeup and spends about two hours a day (at minimum!) in front of a mirror, I can honestly say I have missed the mark, a lot.

Which leaves me in a place of vulnerability.  It is easy to quote 1 Peter 3:3-4 at our Women's Bible Study as we sit in our feel-good shirts and comfortable jeans.  But place me in the middle of the dance floor at midnight with a Cinderella type dress and you've got a recipe for serious insecurity... Again, maybe this isn't you.  But it's me.

Saturday night, I was in the most vulnerable place I've been in a very long time.  I walked out of the house hunched over and making every effort to cover myself (as though my slingy arms can really cover up the "whole package") and I walked and danced pretty much defeated the entire night.

Truthfully, I was an epic fail.  But amidst the epic fail, I have found grace and learned so very much about my heart, and the heart of my fellow sisters.  My longing to be beautiful is of God and for God and His glory.  My beauty doesn't come from 13lbs of makeup, but it can and should reflect outwardly.  It was made to.  And Mommies tend to forget that.  I know I did.

As my sister, I would encourage you to pray and embark with me on this journey to reflecting true Biblical beauty.  It's there, within you.

Just like it's in me.

I just forgot.  Let's not forget anymore.  

ordained praise and established strength

"From the mouth of infants and nursing babes You have established strength Because of Your adversaries, To make the enemy and the revengeful cease." -- Psalm 8:2

Tonight was such a sweet kiss from Heaven for our family.  After my second day back at work, the Husband put on worship and praise music and we all began to worship together as a family. The Baby was jumping up and down, babbling and singing praises in ways only the Lord could understand and the Husband and I began to get lost in His presence. 

It was beautiful and I began to feel His arms surround us and His grace overwhelm us.  It was such a sweet sight.  The Baby kept looking back and forth between Mommy and Daddy and towards the end of the night, she began to lift her hands in worship right alongside us.  She may not have known all of what she was doing or why, but from our example adoration unto the King is being established in her sweet little heart and I know He will accomplish all the purposes of His heart towards the Baby.

In our parenting journey, it is imperative we give honor to our children and understand that our "Lord has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong." (1 Cor 1:27)  He has continually beckoned us to be like little children (Matthew 18:3) and to never hinder them from coming to Christ; the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these (Matthew 19:14).

 

Psalm 127 clearly teaches us the great honor and rank we carry in the Kingdom of God when we allow arrows to be given to us through children.  Scripture is filled with beautiful admonitions of children, yet society screams against them. Mothers and Fathers reject their children physically, emotionally and spiritually daily, human trafficking is characterized by the selling and purchasing of our children and abortions kill thousands of our arrows daily. 

 

I invite you to honor your children in small, special ways and to ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with faith, affections and His thoughts towards them.  Speak Scripture over them today (so that they hear you!), thank them for quickly obeying or for going out of their way to serve;  spend an extra 3 minutes with them telling them about the glorious plans Christ has for them tonight during the bedtime routine, and demonstrate by your example the love of Christ that is willing to lay down life for another.

 

One day, those mighty arrows will bring you honor at the gates of the city...

 

 

*this post is linked with Titus 2esdays 

Biblical Hospitality

Every Wednesday night our house is busting at the seams with youth and young adults.  Around 730p they start filtering in (sometimes even a little before) and they stay well past 1030p.  Wednesday night is our night of service and open hospitality.  I make the very best effort to provide not only dinner (sometimes just a light one or just desserts), but a godly and welcoming atmosphere for them.

And you know?  Something's gotta be going okay.  Because, they keep coming back. And I love it!

One of the things I'm passionate about is hospitality.  I may not be from the "Real South" but I delight in that Southern Hospitality Charm that characterizes a lot of southern states (though why FL has taken a culture of its own and decided not to take on the culture of "The South" is beyond me!). 

I believe it is so very important for every homemaker to practice hospitality as per Biblical Instruction.

"The end of all things is near. Therefore be alert and of sober mind so that you may pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen." --1 Peter 4:7-11

I find it interesting that as Peter admonishes the Church to "offer hospitality without grumbling" at the same time he speaks of the end times ministries. Hospitality is a lost art that must be refound in the homes and heart of godly women. 

We live in a society that tells us it's okay to get away with being greedy and selfish with our resources, because... well, sometimes, we just don't have enough of them to merit the sharing.  If that isn't upside-down and topsy turvy from the Kingdom of God, then I don't know what is. 

And I understand the worry.  I won't partner with it, but I can understand it.  Living frugally (for us) often times means that our grocery list (and budget!) is quite limited and will often reach for just the four of us.  Add an extra five to six people coming to visit us weekly on Wednesdays and our faith is now stretched.

But, here's the beautiful part of this entire hospitality journey.  I find that in giving my humble loaf of bread and two fish, the Christ who called me to minister hospitality multiplies the offering and there is never any lack. Our family has discovered that if we give in our need, He is faithful and has never left us forsaken.  We have ministered out of our home in hospitality at least once a week and our family has never gone hungry.  Through high times (two income budgets for example!) to the lowest of the lowest times (had a family of 6 staying here with us on an empty pantry and empty pocket!). 

My God is a good God who loves to give good gifts.  And the more I give, the more I become like Him.  Scripture is clear in instructing us to practice hospitality.  It is also clear in showing us how Faithful, Good and what a wonderful Provider He is!

Now, it's time to put that to the test... Who will you practice hospitality to in your home this week?

*This post is linked up with Titus2esdays and Homemaking Wednesday

Lavender Pancakes Recipe

Having Caleb home yesterday was such a sweet treat! Even though we didn't celebrate Independence Day in an outstanding way, it was so sweet to see Aaliya spending time with her Daddy all day long.

So, yesterday for brunch (I got to spend a little *extra* time with Jesus yesterday, PTL!) I decided to make pancakes and Caleb's favorite shake. And then, I decided to get adventurous. And the result was pretty yummy lavender pancakes! I love baking with lavender! It is such a yummy herb to eat and to sniff. Anytime I cook/bake with it, my home is automatically naturally aromatized! :)

Since I like ya'll so much, I decided to share the recipe!

Lavender Pancakes
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
3 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon white sugar
1 1/4 cups milk
1 egg
3 tablespoons butter, melted
1 tbls of lavender buds
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
(You can also use pancake mix if you so choose to-- it's just as yummy!)

1.In a large bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, salt and sugar. Make a well in the center and pour in the milk, egg, melted butter, vanilla and lavender; mix until smooth.

2.Heat a lightly oiled griddle or frying pan over medium high heat. Pour or scoop the batter onto the griddle, using approximately 1/4 cup for each pancake. Brown on both sides and serve hot.

Voila! Enjoy!





*This post is linked with Titus2esday!

heart of the home reflects the heart of the mom

As I was climbing up the dreadful three flights of stairs to our humble apartment, while I was holding the baby on my right hip and had three bags hanging on the other and tripping on my ever-feminine-and-ever-long-and-easy-to-trip-on-skirt, I got a startling realization.

I just can't do this. I am beyond overwhelmed and utterly unsatisfied with everything.

I love my husband, but there has to be more to this marriage thing.
I love my children, but there has to be more to this parenting thing.
I love our House of Prayer community, but even in that, there has to be more.

Have you ever felt that way? Left wanting... more. So much more.

I am realizing that I feel overwhelmed and chaotic because, well that's what my home reflects. Although it will never be featured in a Pottery Barn catalogue, as the center of our ministry, our home should reflect that which we desire to pursue.

The Word. Order. Beauty. Holiness.

I am on an overhaul. I simply cannot live in any form of chaos. No, not even organized chaos. I have to feel good in the home I'm living in. How can I minister out of it I don't?

This doesn't mean tons of money spent and calling in for an interior designer (which my aunt is, by the way in case you were looking). It just means I need to re-vamp our home. Move things around, find frugal ways of decorating and exemplifying order, His Word and His Beauty.

Personally, I'll think I'll start by sending for my free 30 prints from Shutterfly and exhibiting our family and our children through numerous picture frames. Then, I think I'll tackle the girls' room next, since it seems the messiest.

Eventually, I'd like to go into our bedroom. Instead of a serene getaway, it's more like a jail cell with a comfy bed.

I have to do this. And while I do, I think I'll pray myself awake.

What are your favorite frugal decorating ideas?

the epitome on homemaking

After two long grueling hours of couponing and creating my grocery lists, I was getting ready to head to bed, when I noticed a slight bit of disorder in one of the nooks and crannies of our blessed apartment.

For a second, I was discouraged because I pretty much planned out my entire day for tomorrow and the bulk of it will be spent *outside* our home. Geez, this house is never 100% in order.

And then, came the epiphany.

It doesn't have to be.

As a homemaker, my primary responsibility is to create a home, not clean one. A home is not defined by its perfect state of being, its absolutely positively impeccable look, nor its fancy design.

A home is defined by the sweet presence of Jesus that lingers within its four walls.

A home is defined by the genuine smiles of little people who truly enjoy living there.

A home is defined by a God-glorifying harmonious marriage where service and cross-like love abound.

A home is defined by a mama who knows what Jesus has asked of her and obeys joyfully.

Such understanding is of course no excuse for laziness and carelessness in the cleanliness of our homes, our children and even ourselves; however, understanding that our primary goal is to create a home for our husbands and our children will lighten the load.

So what if there's always a cup that is left misplaced (hopefully not the same one) when making the "dishwasher run" across your home? So what if it doesn't look like a Pottery Barn catalogue? Is your husband fed well and happy? Do you submit to him, love him and allow the barometer of your home to always be set on Jesus? Is your relationship with your children well-cultivated? Do they see you spending time with them over cleaning sometimes?

That's good, they should.

So, here's to continuing the race, always seeking to be sanctified as a homemaker and understanding that sometimes, well... messy is the new perfect.

What about you? What stands in the way sometimes of true homemaking? Cleaning? Laundry? Outside ministries and influences?

lessons learned while dancing

I love to dance. And I mean, really. I used to dance all the time.

But once again, the mundane got a hold of me and I stopped. Well, thankfully I've got a great set of friends who are actually salsa instructors for a wonderful salsa dancing company (if you live in FL and want to try dancing, hit them up!) and they asked me to run the door for their Clermont location on Friday nights.

I talked to Caleb about it, prayed and went ahead with it. Friday nights is officially Daddy-Daughters date nights. =)

Welp, I'm back in the swing of things... And by swing of things I mean I'm around dancing again.

I'm not dancing myself... much.

However in the midst of my non-dancing much, I am learning and being reaffirmed of one thing.

The man always leads.

In the words of one of the instructors, "Men, if you're not leading the lady, you are the lady."

He says it every beginner's class, and every class he gets a chuckle, but how very true it rings out here in non-dancing mundane real world.

The man was created and intended to lead. It is his job and his calling to be the head of the household and to lead his family into the very purpose which is set upon them by Christ.

Yet in our feminist minded society (why yes, I do happen to wage war on such ridiculous thinking-- feminism) the man and the woman lead, often times the woman taking the lead, demasculinating a man before he gets an opportunity to show what a God-minded, Word-driven, capable of leading man he truly is.

Call me old-fashioned, but I say the man leads. It's his purpose. It's his calling.

So, I'm pondering on this thought when one of the "assistant-teacher-ish" guys comes up to me (in the lobby mind you, because I refuse to dance where anyone's watching) and says "Come on, let's re-teach you how to dance"

Umm, no thanks. (enter fear of humiliation here)

But, I go for it anyway.

So as I'm dancing I realize that my entire life I've been playing lead in this dance of life. Or at least I've tried to. And I'm no good at it.

No wonder partner dancing and me never did well...

Then, of course, as I'm getting the "hang" of it again (and I mean I'm not stepping all over his toes) I hear Rachel (my very pregnant friend who's one of the dance instructors) bark at me... "Stop back-leading! Don't think about it, just follow him and don't think about it."

Apparently, I would follow him but turn when I thought I should turn and step when I thought I should step. I wasn't allowing him to show me or lead me to the place he needed me to be. I was still trying to make my own decisions. Because he's a pretty good dancer and I have 20% of the knowledge he does... I was wrong most of the time.

And then it hit me...

How many of us try to back-lead in our marriages? Portraying the appearance of submission yet really wanting to make things happen behind the scenes. There is still a lack of trust in our husbands and the God inside of them, so we "submit" but then turn and spin as we see fit.

It's one of those things that I need to pray outta me and practice the opossite. The true meaning of submission.

So, as I continue to learn not to backlead in salsa, I will be praying and working out my salvation in this aspect; I will honor my husband and trust the God within him wholeheartedly, practicing the art of real submission.

What about you? Are you aware of the full meaning of submission? What are some ways you may be trying to "back-lead" in your marriage?

This post is linked with Titus2days