the cure to burnout

I wanted to take a little bit to update you all on life. Our life.

The last nine months have been quite the blur and stressful. It seems I was incapable of adjusting to life with one more.  The storm is passing though and I can see things from a different perspective.

Life is still hectic.  Liberty is still feisty and very much a toddler. Justice is mobile, curious little babe and my days are still filled with dirty diapers, snot, occasional spit up and overall insanity.

But, I have finally realized that life is also filled with sweet slobbery kisses and baby's breath.  Snuggles and giggles. Moments that pass us by entirely too quickly. I can attest to the grace of God in this season and His merciful work in my life and in my heart.  The burn-out I found was suffocating me is slowly lifting and I am enjoying my calling as a Mommy and a wife once again.

One thing struck my heart throughout this season though.

Part of my burnout was the fact that I didn't know how to spend time with God in this new, busier season. I attempted to make it look like it did when I mothered one, or when I was newly married or even when I was single, and every single time, I came up short, disillusioned and frustrated (seems I get frustrated a lot, huh?). 

I believe part of having a Mary Heart in our Martha seasons is remembering that God has ordained this season and that time spent with Him will look differently based on our season.  Comparing ourselves to other moms is not helpful in any measure, and comparing ourselves to ourselves in different seasons will only bring disillusionment.

Mommy, be encouraged! Jesus designed you to mother your little arrows at this very moment and He has given you enough grace to draw nearer to Him even during this craziness!  Remember that your quiet time and seeking of His face has no formula.  It doesn't have to be in the morning for an hour, following a Bible reading plan on YouVersion (though praise Jesus for those!).  It can be throughout the days, moments quietly "stolen" between you and your Heavenly Father who desires you.  Connecting with the Lord during these busy seasons has nothing to do with a formula or checklist and everything to do with the posture of our hearts.

Don't get lost in the tools that are meant to usher you to our Father.  Don't get lost in the "have to" and "shoulda, coulda, wouldas" that you forget we love a Merciful God who delights in taking our weakness and demonstrating His strength.  Please Mommy, be encouraged! Jesus is in the midst of your mothering, your dirty diapers and toddler tantrums.  He is in the midst, longing for one single heart glance in His direction.  That is all He needs to draw you near. 

Draw nearer to Him today Mama, and draw strength from a Heavenly God who gives you grace for present trouble and glory for eternity!

Agape,

Some very stern thoughts on mothering and mothers

If I've learned anything in the 25 years I've been a woman, it's this... Women are vicious. They have a natural ability and unfortunate knack to tear each other to shreds with words, actions and even looks.

And, if there's anything I ou've learned in the 5 years I've been a mother (I consider mothering my covenant daughter while courting Caleb part of this), it's that Mommies have an increase drive and knack to tear each other to shreds.

It's so unfortunate but unfortunately true.  My my circles are often characterized by common belief systems regarding parenting or an obvious tug-o'-war of said beliefs.  Heck, it starts even before we give birth.  The battle over which childbirthing method is THE best and THE right one stresses so many women out that often times our carefully planned birthing method has to be chucked out the window and we enter into motherhood with an already defeated mindset and a sense of failure.  We spend the rest of our mothering days trying to catch up and make up for the failure of an unplanned C-Section or "drugged" birth.

Then comes the hard stuff. Nursing or Formula?  Can I nurse? Is giving my baby formula shortcoming him/her?  Vaccines, no vaccines? Organic or non-organic food?  Can I afford organic?  To stay home or not to stay home? Homeschool, Private Education, Public Education? Montessori, Traditional?  Firm or gentle discipline? A mixture of both?  How do I do that?  Am I doing it wrong?  And on and on and on it goes with a group of very passionate women along the way telling you exactly THE way to do it.

And well, this is what I think.

I think I try to do the very best for my baby.  I wanted to deliver my firstborn naturally because that's what I felt was best for me and my daughter, but it turns out I simply couldn't due to a breech position.  So, I delivered via C-section.  I wanted to nurse my firstborn, but couldn't so we gave her organic formula as a substitute.  We wanted her to eat an all-organic diet because we felt that's what was best, but didn't have the resources available to do so.  She still ate healthy and was well-fed, but didn't eat the all-organic diet we had in mind. I nursed my son for as long as I could before his need outgrew my body's ability to create milk.  I tried everything and simply couldn't and have since, also given him organic formula. We decided not to vaccinate and their schooling is still up in the air.  We try to find a happy medium with discipline, though tend to fair in the firm side.  We spank and tolerate zero disrespect or blatant disobedience.  I choose to stay home so that I can devote every second to molding my children lives for the Kingdom of Heaven.  In that endeavor, we have willingly given up certain luxuries so that I have the privilege to do that.

And you know what?  I have felt judged every single step of the way.  I can't say I've felt 100% confident in most of the decisions.  That's probably 100% my fault, because I really need to get my act together and realize that my affirmation comes from Jesus and not anyone else I come in contact with.  Nevertheless, it's time we stop judging one another on our parenting choices and start demonstrating love, encouragement and respect towards one another.  Search out God's will for your family and believe others' are doing the same.  Realize we are serving a big God who is as creative as each individual sunset and as majestic as 1000 oceans and every star.  His purposes for your family will not look the same as mine, and that is perfectly okay.

Let's seriously stop calling ourselves activists when we're really demanding everyone make the same decisions we are. Let's love and encourage one another and believe the very best in each other.  Believe that we are all doing the very best we can.  Let's share information with one another without expectation that it will change anyone. Let's press on to know Christ together as homemakers, wives, mothers and submit ourselves to the clear teaching of Scripture, understanding that Jesus is our creative God who can demonstrate His work in whatever way He choose.

Come on ladies.  Let's just *love* one another.

Agape,

More ramblings on ceasing to strive

I kinda come in and out of this blogging world.  I try to stay consistent, I do.  But it's not secret that I'm one frazzled Mama of three little ones.  I often get disappointed in myself for not writing as often as I want, or about kinda jumping in and out of here.  It's not that I don't want to write nor that I don't have things to write about.  Part of it is the frazzled Mama syndrome and the other part is just me processing and figuring how I'm going to make sense out of the little whispers my heart hears Jesus speak.

Lately me and Jesus have been talking a lot about my incessant striving. It seems I'm a person who can't just stop and be still.  I'm always and constantly striving for acceptance; someone's, anyone's, everyone's acceptance.  I don't say no and I tend to work at pleasing the crowd.  My interest's in general and basic things tend to go with popular vote (by popular, I don't mean culture's popular-- I'm talking about my inner group of friends).  I dress the way I think I'll look less like a geek which tends to put me in this terribly "safe" box where I actually hate most of what I own. I talk a lot just to prove I'm not a dork and I'm just as cool as the rest... which most of the time ends up backfiring as I over-talk and I show my true, uncool colors. What is that thing the Bible says?  Oh yeah... "Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks" (Matt 12:34)

I just don't want to be rejected. I hate being made fun of and I work at avoiding it at all costs.

But, there's a little bit of a big problem.

By nature and design I am a strange and eclectic individual. I'm not the type to be popular or cool.  I've never really understood most "cool" behaviors, styles or general thought processes of the "cool" people I know. In school, I was strange.  I was often the butt of jokes.  It wasn't until high school when I learned how to "play the role" that I became semi-popular.  I really wasn't popular, I just knew people. Most of the people I knew I credit to my amazingly cooler big sister (SHE is the definition of cool) and even among the group of friends we shared, I was the weird girl.  I don't know what it is.  I'm just weird.  I'm strange and different and don't tend to fit the status quo, and I really really don't like it.

In essence, what I'm telling God is that I don't like me.

But lately, it seems I can do no right.  I'm realizing that I'm never going to amount to the person my brain thinks I should be.  Because that girl is an illusion and she is not me.  She is not the person God intended me to be.  I don't even know who that is or what she looks like.  But I'd really like to know because He's telling me I should know.  I think it's all a part of that "Cease striving and know I am God" thing He keeps talking to me about.  When I stop working at gaining other's approval, I can know God.  And at the end of the day, it's not about me. It's about knowing God.  So that's what I'm doing. I'm letting go of my fear and just knowing God. If people make fun of me, if I remain an outsider for the rest of my life... He's pretty much worthy of it and at the end of it all I will have known God.

Agape,

the trouble with Pinetrest

writer's note: One of my bestest Mommy friends and I had a heart-to-heart last night on security. You know, how we place it on everything but Jesus.  So, we decided to link arms and write about the same thing, but from different perspectives. While I write about material security, she's writing about finding security in our physical beauty.  Hop on over to her blog and check it out!

I have a confession to make.

I have a latest obsession.  It's called Pinetrest.  You've never heard of it? Well click on that link right back there and get to Pinning!

Truthfully it's a blessing and a curse.  On one hand, I've been able to get so many great ideas on frugal decorating that I can make myself (which is awesome!) but on the other hand, I have quick access to pictures of others' homes that make me drool.

I even have a board called dream house.  I'm pathetic, I know... But, here's a peek. ;)

I drool everytime I see these pictures.  And then this ugly seed takes root in my heart... You may have heard of it.  It's called discontenment.  Suddenly I am so aware of how little our family has.  We live in a cramped cozy two bedroom apartment with two daughters, and about four closets full of junk.  Our walls are bare simplistic and our furniture is hand-me-down vintage. 

It's not that I'm not grateful or anything.  No, of course not.  It's just that, well... I know friends that have houses like these, or kitchens like that, or even... (gasp!) a beautiful library like that... How utterly unfair and ridiculous this all is.

So, I start praying.  That God grants to us a bigger house.  Because "God, we need it."  That God gives us a mini-van or some sort of larger vehicle.  Because, "well God, we really really need it."  And so on and so forth.

I have come to the realization and the ugly truth that I am most secure and confident when I've completed a diy home project and it's proudly displayed in whatever room of the house it belongs in.  I am most confident when friends come over and my home doesn't have that messy lived-in look.  In truth, I imagine myself confident with a living room like this...

A playroom like this...

 Or a guest room/chill room like this...

How absolutely pathetic. Throw tomatoes at me.  Boo me... I know, I know, keep it coming.

But like King Solomon declared all throughout Ecclesiastes, "Vanity, vanity, everything is vanity!"  I have to learn to find my security in Christ.  It's safe to say that God will never grant me those things with my heart in the condition it is.  It'll be the destruction of me.  And, it's pretty safe to say that deep inside, I know that none of those things will bring any form of security or confidence.  I find that in Christ alone.

"The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge..." -- Psalm 18:2

Yet Scripture exhorts us explaining to us that where your treasure is, there your heart will be also (Matthew 6:21).  My treasure is wrongfully placed in my home and my heart will break every time something minor goes off road, until I learn to be kingdom-minded.  Until I learn to set my eyes on eternity, on the heavenly just like 2 Corinthians exhorts us to do. 

My security is Christ alone.  He alone is a safe-place and refuge.  He alone is a rock and a fortress.  He alone can keep me safe.  My home may burn down and I may have to leave it behind someday, but if I am secure in His love, then I win. <3

ramblings of a step parent



When I first began this journey.
Daniella barely 3 years young.

One of the best, most complicated aspects of my life is step-parenting.  I know, I know... I hate the word "step" too.  But it is often too complicated to explain what people otherwise associate with this word. 

Don't get me wrong, this "step" business is filled with so many highs and joys, but along with it come some of the most challenging situations I'll probably ever have to go through.

I have always prayed that Christ would grant to me the ability to love Daniella as unconditionally as I would love any other child that He blesses me with.  I don't want there to be an ounce of difference between her and any other siblings she may have.  I never want to hear her say, "This is my half sister/brother, oh and that's my Dad's wife."  Never. Ever. Ever. Ever!

I can truly say that although is a continual pursuit in the revelation of adoption, God has been good to me and He has given me grace to love.

In everything though, I am finding this stepparenting experiencing quite lonely*.  Most people I know carry one of two mentalities when it comes to our very very unique situation;

  1) "I could never do that" and so they don't.  They lack the understanding and the desire to really understand so they purposefully set themselves away from it all.  The thought of even coming in with me and getting their hands and knees dirty is just inconceivable.

  2)  "I would help out and all, but so long as it doesn't affect me negatively."  The idea of laying down my life for the sake of another-- even more that it is someone who is not "flesh and blood" is absolutely prepostorous, so they advice me to just walk away and kinda keep at a distance.  Well, considering my answered prayer from a paragraph or two ago, it doesn't really seems like that's an option. 

Us now. This is sweet-sweet journey!

Both parties mean well, and I am by no means speaking against either.  It is hard, and truthfully, I probably wouldn't quite know how to handle if I wasn't the one in the midst of it all.  I probably would say "I could never do that" and just lack understanding, comfortably.  And that's okay.

In this lonely journey, I'm finding that I have to truly press into the Lord.  I'm having to receive revelation and grace as to how to do this in a manner that will glorify Him and benefit my sweet Daniella Grace, from Scripture, when there's no exact scenario or exhortation in Scripture on it.  I'm having to be vulnerable with my husband in every opinion, every thought and every emotion (and may I say vulnerability is not my specialty).  I'm learning that for me to stepparent successfully, I have to die to myself and I have to posess qualities so much like Jesus that it is impossible for me to do it without Him.

I remember picking up a book on stepparenting at Border's once.  I browsed through and in reading the first page or so, I realized what an awful mentality our society has on step-parenting.  One parent was quoted "I really don't get along with my stepkids that well.  They don't like me, and truthfully, I don't really like them.  It's a mutual understanding and respect that has allowed neither one of us to build up resentment against the other." 

Yikesssss!

I'm pretty positive that's not how Jesus would do it.  I'm pretty positive He speaks to the stepparent and encourages them to give up the child (in love, so to speak) and their very lives and heart in the process for the purpose of life. (read all about it in 1 Kings 3:16-28) 

I think my *favorite* part of this lonely journey is that I know this is what He has chosen for me.  One of the worship leaders at the International House of Prayer-KC once said that "God chose the generation, the nation, the circumstance, the family, the very heritage into which you should be born so that you would love Him the most." 

When this thing gets tough and all manners of self-seeking thoughts and attitudes knock at my door, I have to, I choose to remind myself that He has chosen this for me.  This was done out of His Sovereignty and His purposes will reign. 

It's a team effort, this Mommy business

In the meantime, I'd like to encourage you.  Look around the people in your life.  Is there anyone who has a "difficult, sticky" situation they live with?  Are you readily available to offer prayer and/or Biblical support?  Have you prayed for them lately?  Chances are, they need it.  Ask God to encounter you with a spirit of adoption and pray for someone you normally "wouldn't know how to" pray for. 

I will be content

I am about to fit six extra people into our already crowded cozy two-bedroom apartment.  And I have to say, I'm slightly nervous.

As I was doing a massive overhaul of cleaning today (because of course, last week's cleaning in preparation for this blessed event was just that... last week's cleaning) I began to really question myself.  Why is it that I feel like I have to "put on a show" everytime family or guests come to visit? There is this unspoken pressure that causes me to perform, act, you know... Make sure the house really sparkles and shines. I don't fully understand it.  It's not like my family or guests have ever complained about my living arrangements.  It's not like they've ever made me feel nor mentioned any form of distaste towards what and how I do what I *try* to do. 

But, there it is.  Everytime family and guests come.  That ugly monster peeks its head and I become an insecure teenager again.  Except this time, it's not about the zit on my forehead, it's about the hiccup in decorating style or small living quarters I have to offer. 

The mature, sensible part of me screams, "That's just silly!"  But the very human side of me struggles to find contenment in my surroundings and myself.  We go back to that upside down way of our society.

I don't mean to sound like a broken record, but the closer I get to Christ, the more I see how utterly backwards our society is.  We seek for more things and bigger things but forsake the One Thing. That one thing that Paul count everything as loss, for the sake of knowing It.  Here I am, worried that my tiny cozy apartment won't be enough, but it's all I have to offer.  It's all I've been given to steward and my heart and mind must find contenment in it.  I'm drawn away by more and forget that He is my provider and He provides according to our needs and His wisdom.

I will set my heart on Christ and learn the meaning of contenment.  I will live simply so that I can simply live life more abundantly hidden in Christ.  I will remind myself that He decides how much I should steward and find joy, contenment and peace there.

And if someone else chooses to judge me for it... Well then, so be it.

confronting fear, affliction and earnestly seeking Him

"I will go away and return to My place until they acknowledge their guilt and seek My face; in their affliction they will earnestly seek Me." --Hosea 5:15

I've devoted a couple of blog posts to whining expressing frustration, confusion and overwhelm to this season of life. It's just... brutal.

Motherhood and marriage is a crash course to holiness, righteousness and Christ-likeness 101. Truth of the matter is, you can't be a great wife and mom without the sweet grace and tender mercies of Christ Jesus.

How can we love when we don't know love? As I was sitting, reading Scripture this morning, it dawned on me that I have yet to truly know the love of Christ. 1 John reminds us that "perfect love casts out all fear." I still fear Beloved. Oh, how I fear.

As my exceprt from my journal reveals, "I live in constant fear; of the dark, of the shadows, of catastrophe, of starving, of not having enough money, of not being a good enough mother, wife, or individual. The list goes on and on." And it's a secret list that reminds me and confronts me with the truth of my own affliction and the very fact that I have yet to know the love of Christ in a truly intimate way.

I still have such a long way to go Beloved. So very long to go! But while reading Hosea this morning I realized something. In my affliction, I have and will earnestly seek Him. My affliction hardly compares to men and women who are being martyred daily, or persecuted for righteousness sake, or even tortured in the name of religion, but my affliction is one of heart, a relational one so to speak.

Personally speaking, this season has been hard not only because I'm a new mom and I'm still trying to figure this thing out, but because there are other elements, other "pieces to the puzzle" so to speak that cause my heart to break and ache on a very regular basis. It's been a personal journey of leaning into my Beloved with (quite literally) all that I have and believe that He alone is True and Faithful.

And can I just say...
It's.Been.Hard.

But...

In some beautifully chaotic way, I have earnestly sought my sweet, precious God and I have grown so much closer to Him through all of this. My affliction of heart has caused me to earnestly seek Him. Just like He said it would in Hosea. And in that realization, I have to just know and trust that He is good; and He will work all things for my good. Not my desires, not my capricious wants, but truly my eternal, heavenly and Holy good.

nd suddenly, that affliction turns from pain to beauty, from frustration to understanding and from weeping to dancing.

starting from scratch

So I've been on this kick lately and I've decided I want to make as many things from scratch as possible.

Part of preparing for the times ahead (take a look at the news and you'll note that our nation is in grave danger and we should be good stewards of every resource in not only providing for today, but preparing for potential crisis.

I have been seeking guidance and wisdom from other wives and mamas on how they are super resourceful. I've come across the exact same two answers time and time again.

Couponing and making things from scratch.

So naturally, I will be pursuing both and hopefully becoming super good at them! =)

My first priority is learning to make things from scratch. I will, of course, be combining couponing (to the best of my novice ability) but will really be focusing on making things from scratch and (hopefully!) freezing them.

I think this will be such a time and money saver as purchasing and making in bulk tends to be the most frugal and cost-effective.

I am so excited!

So, here's my "from-scratch" list:

1) Baby Food: Super excited about this one. I figured I'd try some basic fruits and veggies first and then I would jump in and mix 'em up and make yummys!

2) Homemade Yogurt: Aaliya's been on a yogurt kick lately and Caleb and I enjoy it (well, I do... sometimes) so why not? Plus, it's a neat way to add affordable and healthy snacks into our daily routine.

3) Amish Bread: Don't know if you know, but I've been on an Amish kick lately. I am fascinated with everything Amish. =) Sooo I'm gonna attempt the Amish Bread. Suuuuper excited and I hear it's so yummy.

4) Sofrito: This is a puerto-rican seasoning marinade-ish kinda thing. It's not hard at all, but I normally buy it and I figured making it would be best.

5) Red Beans: This is probably gonna be interesting... So, we'll see...

So, what sorta stuff do you make from scratch? Any tips or recipes you're willing to share?

creative Christianity

I woke up this morning, fed Aaliya while super groggy and still half-asleep, I cuddled with her and then as she dozed off for her nap, I had a mini shut-eye for 15mins. Then, I woke up, got ready for my day and sat down to spend some time with the precious Holy Spirit.

And then, a knock at the door. Sammy's here. So much for time alone with the Lord. Sighh.

I am but a novice in the Mommy department and I know things are significantly easier since I really only have two of my own, one of which I share half the time. When I don't have Sammy, it is super easy to spend time with Jesus and get things done. But, Sammy is a sort of preparation for a larger family, so I find myself unable to do the same things I ws doing before to spend time with Him.

It is a new season...

Much like in Song of Solomon 2 when the Bridegroom declares, "Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come along." (v.10) Mommyhood is this entirely new season where the Lord is calling us to arise and mother. Yet, like the Shulamite we tell Him to turn away from us, intimidated by this great call. So much like the Shulamite again, we seek Him whom our soul loves the same way we sought him previously (in previous seasons of our lives), over and over again expecting the same thing, but getting zero results (Songs 3:1).

Mommyhood is altogether a new season in every facet of life, including our walk with Jesus. So, setting aside time to feed our spirits will look entirely different from that of a college student, a mother with older children and a retired individual. It just does... But, that doesn't mean that we get to just be Marthas without having the joy and intimacy of sitting at the feet of our Beloved Jesus.

So, again... I am no expert, but here are some practical ways I have learned to feed my flesh while doing the "mundane" so to speak.

• Prayer Room Atmosphere: This is directly related to our last post on being the barometer of the home, but always have some sort of worship music playing in the background. The Holy Spirit delights in our worship to Him, even if it's right smack in the middle of changing a poopy diaper, preventing our own personal melt down or while dusting furniture. Truly, He delights in the very effort of our hearts, and the atmosphere of worship will tenderize our Spirits to listen to Him more keenly.
• Be wise with your time: Attempt to place your children on a schedule where at least once a day, they take a nap at the same time. Then, use that time for one on one with Jesus. Don't worry about the laundry or the dishes or dusting or ironing. Spend that quiet time in your home as a sacred time with the Holy Spirit. Even while ministring as a mom and a wife, we must still keep Jesus first and prioritize Him above all else!
• Faith comes by hearing: Listen to teachings from your favorite speakers while you are cooking or dusting or vacuuming. As the kids are entertained with another activity, pop in your ipod (with one headphone so that you can still listen and keep an eye out on the kids) and listen away. There are also numerous apps and resources where you can listen to the Word of God. I did this yesterday while cooking and loved it! We are also playing the Word every night as we sleep. :)
• Sacrifice: Even though I am failing miserably at my maximize your morning challenge, I still stand with the conviction that waking up early is an absolute must for mamas, including myself. That time at dawn is so sacred and beautiful, that I can almost guarantee nothing we do throughout the day will match that.

These are just a few simple suggestions and again I am by no means a pro. But I really believe this is the time to be feeding our spirits consistently and the ministry of wife and mommyness should not stand in our way. :)

What creative ways do you incorporate in spending time with Jesus as a wife and mommy?

maximize mornings update and breakfast woes

So a few weeks ago, I wrote a post on how I was on a mission. I was on a mission to Maximize my Mornings. To be transparent and quite honest. This blog post will probably fall under the "blunder" and/or "epic fail" category.

For a few days I was quite amazing. I was up by 630a and I was fully able and capable to function the rest of the day. Naturally, I was under the covers earlier, but it was actually quite nice and I was loving it! Then, I hit some sort of funk and found myself super tired all of the time. It even got so that I woke up for Aaliya's 730a feeding, she would lay with me in bed and I would nap with her during her morning nap (which is normally around an hour after she wakes up to eat). I was sleeping in until 10-11am!

Talk about epic fail.

Recently, I've been getting back on track (slowly) to where I'm waking up between 7a and 730a, feeding Aaliya and then continuing on the rest of my day and skipping my morning nap. Even though this is improvement, I really desire to make the most out of my days and wake up before the sun rises as Proverbs 31 encourages us to do.

"She rises also while it is still night and gives food to her household and portions to her maidens."
--Prov 31:15

I desire to bring food to my household both physically and spiritually... So, let's take a look at what this looks like.

Physical Food

In speaking with Caleb a few weeks back and talking about the things which he desires of me, one very simple thing he requested. Breakfast in the mornings. See, I haven't been the Mommy nor Wife that serves breakfast to her household. I've been the "spend entirely too much money for pre-made breakfast sandwiches" and fend for yourselves Momma. Sooo not cool.

My biggest issues with breakfast?

Waking up early is definitely one of them. After all, Caleb leaves to work around 730a which would require me to wake up around 630a to make a decent and simple breakfast and give him enough time to eat it, versus always going on the run.

My second biggest issue? I'm so not a morning breakfast person. My breakfast consists of coffee and whatever else I can get together, if anything. (Yes I know this is a very bad habit, let's take baby steps here people!) My husband on the other hand requests a high protein, practically glutten free diet. So, his breakfast requests are eggs (yuck!) and such. I don't mind making breakfast, but can we meet halfway here?

Ehh. Anyway, I am very much requesting any breakfast recipes that you want to share. If they are high protein without including eggs, you get a gold star!

Spiritual Food

I firmly believe Proverbs 31 is both a practical and spiritual application to wives and mommas. Therefore in verse 15, as quoted previously, part of its meaning (as revealed to me by the Holy Spirit) is a wife who can share Rhema Words with her family throughout the day as the Holy Spirit revealed to her in her morning devotional time with Him.

I desire to be a wife and mom who feeds her household spiritually. As a homemaker, it is my responsibility to set the atmosphere in our home, and I desire to set an atmosphere where it is easy to seek the Lord and my words and encouragement can help do that.

So... where does that leave me?

Asking God for the grace to wake up early and take it one step at a time. My current goal is to wake up early enough to serve my husband breakfast. I want to tackle the physical first because I am able to spend devotional time with the Lord later on in my day. Though not ideal, I believe the Lord will honor me as I seek to honor Him by honoring my husband in this small, seemingly insignificant manner.

So, let's shoot for 645a tomorrow, shall we?

Maximize your Mornings!

So, just the other I was talking and whining to the Lord about how I just don't have enough hours in the day. Even though I tend to get the bulk of my to-do list done, I always felt like so much time was wasted running around like a chicken with my head cut off. Now that I'll be going full time in the prayer room, I'd really like to get into a routine where I feel like my time is maximized. You can guess my delight when I received an e-mail from Inspired to Action inviting mamas to a challenge to maximize their morning by reading through the E-Book available at the website and implementing a routine. Score! So, I am very happy to say that I will be starting as of tonight (as in, I'm gonna start reading) and I will *hopefully* be able to implement a routine and stick to it this coming week. Hoorah! I'm on my way to completing one of my resolutions (waking up daily at 6a).

If you'd like to join me on the challenge, click here and let Michelle know you're in. :)

How do you take advantage of your mornings?

Amazon Mom=Awesome

Mommy's excited!

Just found out about Amazon Mom on the Amazon website, and I'm pretty excited. I found a box of 216 size 1 Pampers Swaddlers for $20.19. This makes mama very excited, and very proud. I have made it a goal to live a frugal lifestyle until our circumstances change, and have felt like I have been a huge failure. This find encourages me to keep pressing on! :)

[enter in discouragement]

Okay, so at almost seven months pregnant (four more days of my second trimester) I feel like a ridiculous failure. The bulk of my pregnancy has been spent in a melancholy state and/or in a state of chaos. I am so ready for life without these crazy hormones. I really feel done.

I began this blog as a way for me to record this homemaking journey I knew I was to make. And instead of becoming a better homemaker, I feel discouraged, stressed and (evidently) frustrated. Maybe it's the standards I'm holding myself to, maybe it is these crazy hormones, but maybe it's the call to something deeper that I can't understand. Regardless of which one it is (though I'm beginning to think it's a little of all three) I'm ready to not feel like this. Ready to have my cup "runeth over" once again and not feel like everything I'm doing is a total wreck.

Forgive my Ecclessiastes moment, however I must say "There is nothing new under the sun! Solomon, I feel ya brother... If there's anyone out there actually reading my blog, I'm asking for prayer. Seriously. This rut has held me far too long, and I'm so ready for normalcy and fulfillment again. I want to be content with the life and the calling the LORD has given to me. So, with that being said... cue out discouragement, and please, enter grace...

Grocery Shopping

I must say, I don't think I've ever walked out of the grocery store so happy, ever! =) I went grocery shopping this past Friday. We've been dining out a lot, and I want to continue to save as much money as possible for the arrival of our little Princess. The plan is for me to stop working and I can't quite do that if our needs won't be met. I want to be a good steward of our money, and although the ocassional dine-out is no big, we were just a little outta control. LOL. Anyways, I went to Publix (I refuse to grocery shop at Wal-Mart) and wouldn't you know it their sales were absolutely phenomenal!! I was able to buy Cascadian Farms Organic Cereal for $1.99 which is unheard of, as well as BOGO's on other types of organic cereals for Caleb. We also were able to purchase organic frozen lunches for Caleb for work at $2.00 each. The organic lettuce was also BOGO, so I got two for the price of one. All Seventh Generation Cleaning Products were reduced by 25% so I stocked up pretty good and I was able to do most of my shopping in an eco-friendly way. Caleb and I really value organic food as something worth spending money on (it's more of an investment to us and our health) however, due to financial challenges haven't been able to fully go organic for a while. Thanks to Publix off Good Homes in Orlando, we were able to buy mostly organic foods and still stick within our budget. =) It's really interesting that it happened this week as well, since my friend Mary Jo (http://www.covenanthomemaking.com/) and I were discussing the challenges of buying organic on a budget, but the amazing deals she finds in the small town in Virginia she lives in. Wouldn't ya know it, I was totally blessed this week and was able to purchase what we were looking for at great prices! I was so excited I called Caleb and told him all about it. He definitely didn't share as much excitement, but was glad I was able to stick to budget and bring home healthy food! I'm actually headed out the door to stock up on a couple more items so that we don't need to get them for a while!

PS.
Mary Jo from http://www.covenanthomemaking.com/ is having a giveway on her page on Cascadian Farm Organic Foods. That's another way you could save on grocery shopping this month! =)

So much to do! So little time...

The more pregnant I get, and the more I look around, the more I notice that there is so much to do, with so little time. This isn't just in preparation for the arrival of our little person (kudos to Melissa for hooking us up massively on behalf of that transition), but just life in general. I'm wearing several hats and they're all important to me. The goal is to lead a balanced life and to be able to get most of it done. I realize I'm not super-woman, but I know that what I currently have on my plate I can handle. I'm not over-burdening myself, nor am I lazy and overwhelmed (anymore, thanks to the glorious first trimester GONEEEE), however I've got to figure out a system that is gonna work, and a schedule that I can follow. I'm normally not a schedule person, more like a fly by the seat of my pants kinda gal, however... with everything that's going on around me, I can hardly say that anything else is gonna work. So, with that in mind, my latest project and focus is coming up with a schedule that will be functional and helpful for the entire Arrazolo household. If anyone has any suggestions, please share them. I'm an eager student!!