Sunday, January 27, 2013

Pour out

I have been a grouch lately.

A lot of transition has been going on in our little family. The Husband's work has relatively changed; we've moved, clear across the city; we've linked arms with an apartment ministry that demands our attention (as it should!); I'm starting the process to go back to school; and personally speaking God is doing a general gutting of my heart, so to speak. 

Add a toddler and a very active, mobile 8 month old to the mix and it could be ugly. 

Oh, don't forget my home-schooled seven year old covenant daughter. 

Life is just a general hot mess in our home.  I don't say that in a negative term.  I am so grateful for what Jesus is doing in our life.  He has really shown Himself graceful and good to our family.  2013 has come with a bucket-load of transitions after a very long (very. long) and very quiet (very. quiet!) season in our home. And I thank Jesus for His timing. 

But something happens with me and transition.  Apparently, I'm not a big fan of change.  When change comes into our day-to-day lives, I tend to put up my walls and be a grump.  I don't do it on purpose.  I don't even realize what I'm doing or why, but I know that I change, I become a grouch and something just... doesn't *click* internally. 

But then, I remember one of my favorite verses... 

"Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us
 Psalm 62:8

Scripture reminds me (charges me, even!) to pour out my heart before God.  The Maker of Heaven and Earth, the Alpha & the Omega is 100% interested in my heart and wants to hear me out on life! What a beautiful reality. My Maker wants to me my best friend. He does not despise our mundane day-to-day life as wives and mothers.  He doesn't see our calling beneath His glory and power.  Instead, He stands in "the trenches" with us, becoming our refuge.  

And suddenly, the change, the sacrifices, the lifestyle we choose to live (that of voluntary weakness) doesn't seem so bad.  I will pour out my heart before Him who hears.  God is a God who hears (Psalm 65:2), who sees (Genesis 16:13-14), who understands (Hebrews 4:15)! 

So, practically, what does it look like for us to pour out our hearts before Him?
  • Converse with Him -- God hears.  Even if it's a sentence here and a plea for help there, in the midst of your moment, whether happy or sad, joyous or heart-wrenching, just take a moment to tell Him what you need, how you feel.  Of course He knows, but how happy it makes His heart to hear us share ourselves with Him! *
  • Write it Out -- I think this is probably my absolute favorite way of pouring myself out to Him. I keep a journal (yes, a mom of 3 old lady like me journals, though not in the traditional sense) that I write in whenever I need to make a decision, or talk things out with someone.  This year, I am being very intentional about trying to write things down and talk them out with God, before I discuss it with my husband or pick up the phone and call my girlfriends. He needs to be my source of counsel, not man (though I will still most definitely be discussing it with my husband and confiding in my close group of girlfriends who love Jesus like I do and hear Him out too... In a multitude of counselors, there is safety! (Proverbs 11:14))
  • Use your gifts -- God has given to each of us a specific set of gifts that are personal to each individual and cannot be exchanged for anyone elses.  Whatever that gift is, has been given as a means of expression and communicating between you and God.  I find that as a teacher, I pour out my heart before God while teaching, and teaching then becomes a means of a two-way communication between me and the Father.  Same thing with whatever gift you have been given!   
I encourage you today Mommy to pour out your heart before the loving God who hears you, sees you and is a refuge to you.  He will listen.  Admist chaos, dirty diapers, messy floors and pajama pants. He desires you. 


As you're conversing with God Almighty, it's equally (if not more so) important to cultivate a lifestyle of listening to the Lord. It is only this way that we will truly understand that He is a refuge for us as this Scripture indicates.