the secret to a successful, happy marriage

It's kind of funny, ironic in a God sorta way.  The last week and a half or so, many friends and fellow bloggers have zoned in on the subject of marriage.  Melany wrote an amazing post on loving our husbands a couple days back.  Then today, Mary Jo surprised me by writing on six ways to love your husband (even when you're exhausted) and of course Darlene is writing about marriage all month long over at Time-Warp Wife.

It's so beautiful how the Spirit of God is highlighting this area with so many young and seasoned believers!  The covenant relationship of marriage is supposed to demonstrate to the world the covenant relationship we, as believers, have with the Son of God.  He is likened to a Bridegroom throughout the Old Testament (Is 54:5, Isaiah 61:10, the entire book of Hosea), Gospels (Matthew 22:1-14) and even at the culmination in the book of Revelation (Rev 19:7-9). 

And yet, our fallen, sinful human nature in partnership with darkness has dampened this relationship that is so precious and dear to the heart of God. Caleb and I were talking last night-- one of those deep down, honest, raw, "this-is-how-I-really-feel" talks.  As we both spoke and bore our hearts, the common thread in every word, in every whisper of the heart was humanity; broken humanity.

That's what it kept coming back to.  And with the whisper of our human hearts came the whisper of the Spirit of God.  Suddenly I knew the secret to every successful, happy, seemingly-perfect marriage I've ever known or may think I know. (writer's note: I am not so naive as to think any marriage is perfect, but you and I both know of godly, mature, inspiring marriages that we'd like to emulate) 

The secret to those marriages is simple and yet so very complex; grace.  Not the noun grace, but rather the verb grace.  You know the one who's definition is such:

• the granting of a favour or the manifestation of goodwill, esp by a superior
• a sense of propriety and consideration for others
• mercy; clemency

Yeah. I kinda sighed heavily too. If only I learned to show grace instead of nag, or word-vomit all over him about my day when he comes home.  If only I learned that in all my insecurities and fears, he's not perfect either and he carries a set of imperfections just as well as I do.  I think if I learned to do that, I'd love my husband better and I'd be a whole lot happier.  Who says happily ever after doesn't exist?

What do you think?